New Post up on Return page

Interested in a cigarette smoking, beer drinking nun who skipped liturgy to cook dinner? One who spent most of her life helping the poor and homeless of Paris, and aided the Jews during the Holocaust? Who created such a problem for the Nazis that they sent her to the nortorious Ravensbruk concentration camp, where she gave her life for another, terrified victim of the gas chambers? Then click on my Return page, and read about St. Maria of Paris, who died in 1945.

You might also be interested to know that I’m involved with a pan-Orthodox centre named after her, in Victoria, BC. Modeled after her life and principles, our centre helps the disadvantaged, fosters Orthodox unity, supports culture and promotes learning. We’re working on a web-page, but if you are on Facebook, then check out the page we have there.

Published in:  on February 7, 2010 at 6:42 am Leave a Comment

The Jesus Prayer – Book Review

The Jesus  Prayer – The Ancient Prayer that tunes the heart to God by Frederica Mathewes-Green.
Published by Paraclete Press,
ISBN 978-1-55725-659-1

This is not a book primarily intended for Orthodox, although there’s a lot we can learn about the prayer and its history and our faith by reading it. It’s aimed at non-Orthodox who have heard about the prayer and want to know more about it and how to say it.

The book is in two parts. Part one is history, scripture, terms, concepts and general Orthodox theology. Without actually coming out and saying so, Frederica makes the point that you can’t say the prayer without understanding something about the Orthodox faith so the first part of the book contains a lot of basic Orthodox theology that is more than helpful, especially to non- and new Orthodox. She explains terms and concepts clearly and simply, using metaphors that are vivid, easily understandable and relevant. A lot of what Frederica says puts things clearly that I understood but didn’t have words to express, or that I knew on a subconscious level, that she brings into focus and full understanding.

She leads simply and easily from her opening discussion of the Biblical injunction to “pray without ceasing” to the radical (to non Orthodox) concept of theosis, and how the prayer is designed to lead one into theosis. Along the way, we learn about the Philokalia, the Way of a Pilgrim, and how the prayer progresses from a string of words repeated in your mind, to the true “prayer of the heart” in which it is an “effortless and spontaneous self-repetition . . . emanating from the core of your being . . .” This leads her into an explanation of the Orthodox faith and some of the differences between Eastern and Western Christianity. She’s remarkably balanced about it, outlining differences without either overly praising the Orthodox, or at all denigrating Western thought.

She ends the section by explaining that it is only through recognizing God’s immeasurable love for us, and responding to it by repenting and begging for mercy that we can begin the long road to submersing our will in God’s. From there, she concludes with the radical (to anyone!) concept that “[t]his Eastern Christian path is not particularly concerned with morality or good behavior, surprisingly enough; it is concerned with a relationship.” The Jesus prayer is about “continual immersion in God’s presence” so that we too can experience “the peace of God, which overflows all the nous” to keep our hearts and minds in Christ.

The second part, in a question and answer format, is about the practicalities of saying the prayer. Preparation consists of “getting your house in order”, which is good advice for anyone and on having a spiritual mother or father to rely on. If this book were aimed at Orthodox, here is where I might disagree with her – it has been my belief that, other than the parish priest, most Orthodox laity do not need a spiritual elder – we aren’t monastics, and our lives are not to be lived in imitation of monastics, whose igumens are their spiritual elders. But for non-Orthodox honestly desiring to draw closer to God, without being immersed in Orthodox thinking and culture, I think it’s a good piece of advice.

There is advice and commentary on when and how often to say the prayer, how many repetitions to use, how to keep track of how many you’ve said, whether to have a set place to say the prayer (don’t forget, an icon corner is a specifically Orthodox practice), what form of the prayer to use and the problem of “have mercy”.

This came as a surprise to me, that anyone might have problems with “have mercy on me”. But, as Frederica explains, Westerners don’t have the same understanding of “mercy” as the Eastern Church does – to us it’s the prodigal son pleading to come home and be forgiven and loved, or the good Samaritan, helping the robbery victim by the roadside. For me, it has a flavour of when I was little and I felt bad or may have done wrong, but Dad’s lap and arms were always there to cuddle me and make it better. For a Westerner, it carries a very legalistic overtone, to be lenient when handing out the punishment.

Frederica also goes into some of the deeper issues around the prayer –  its surface similarity to other Eastern meditation techniques, a deeper discussion of the prayer rooted in the heart, the problems of pride and delusion and being seduced by having “spiritual experiences” and the distractions that occur as one practices the prayer. While some of this will be familiar to anyone who has done any study on the Jesus Prayer, or tried (or is trying) to say it, it’s still refreshing to hear the Fathers’ repeated and reworded in ways that are accessible and meant for lay, not monastics.

Even though the book is meant for Western Christians interested in the Jesus prayer, and will be an excellent introduction for them to both the prayer and Eastern Christianity, I would recommend it for any Orthodox who haven’t encountered this discipline and want to see what it’s all about. Frederica is one of the best writers around at taking difficult concepts and theological principles and making them understandable to non-academics, without sacrificing either clarity or depth and she does it beautifully in this book.

Music hath charms – Cary Chow Victoria concert.

Full disclosure: Cary Chow is my godson, so this is not an unbiased report of his concert.

Even so, it was one of the most incredible experiences of my life! Cary is a concert pianist with a difference. Not only is he incredibly talented and intense in his playing, he likes listening to heavy metal and sports tattoos. He has a passion for animal skin boots and I love to hear about his latest acquisitions. He played last night at the Alix Goolden Hall. I attended knowing that most of what Cary does would go over my head. I don’t really know how to listen to classical music – the explanations people give me about what the music is saying make no sense to me – it’s music and most of it I can appreciate with my mind, but not my heart. That’s especially true of the composers Cary favours – way too highbrow for me, and their music, while compelling, is something I don’t understand and can’t relate to emotionally. Well, I got a lesson in how to listen last night.

Cary’s playing was, as always, intense and focused. In his first piece, Brahms Fantasty Pieces Op. 116, I had my eyes closed for most of it – my eyesight seemed like a distraction. My mind, as always, was running away with itself, not staying focused on the music, but wandering here & there – thinking about the creative process and wondering how it differs between writers and muscians (have to ask Cary about that sometime), how the venu (which I love for its architecture as well as its acoustics) worked with and complemented what I was listening to. It didn’t slow down once I couldn’t see, but I entered what I can only describe as a meditative state – the mind kept running in the background but most of me was focused on the music. At the end of the piece, it was like waking, but I remembered everything that happened.

In his second piece, Rachmaniov’s Sonata#1 in D Minor, Op.28, I began to feel the music physically – by the Lento movement (?) I could feel the music pressing on my skin and tangling in my hair. I could feel the vibrations of the bass notes in the seat beneath me, on my thighs and the palms of my hands.

But it was the second half of the program that really got to me. In Liszt’s Harmonies du soir (Transcendental Etude #11) I began feeling the notes inside my torso – not the low bass notes but the higher notes – they slid in and resonated quite nicely. And then, in the final piece, Liszt’s Apres une lecture du Dante, Cary played two notes over and over – and I could hear them as both blurry at the edges and extremely sharp-edged at the same time (sharp in the sense of a knife edge, not in the musical sense of sharp or flat).  I’ve never experienced that when listening to music before.

All through this, in each piece he played, I was in that meditative state – the mind running uselessly in the background, but most of me caught up in the moment, experiencing Cary’s playing as an entire universe in which I existed. The rest of the world had disappeared. That’s never happened to me before outside of my meditation and my writing.  I hated coming back at the end of each piece, and I really appreciated the way Cary let the notes trail off into silence, and the way the audience waited a second or so before exploding into applause – it was such a shock to leave the music and what it did to me, that the silence helped the transition back into the world.

I’m not sure what I learned, but I hope I can repeat that experience – it’s a wonderful way to listen to music, and I’m so glad it was my godson who gave me that gift!

Published in:  on December 5, 2009 at 7:26 pm Leave a Comment
Tags: , , , , , , , ,

Saturday – Fairfield Community Place

I’ll be there on November 28, at the Fairfield Community Place, 1330 Fairfield Road from 1:30 to 3:30 pm. If you’d like to see me, as well as Kit Pearson, Julie Lawson, Nikki Tate, Jeff Rudd, Fiona Bayrock and other local and incredibly good authors, come on out – there will be door prizes, signed copies of the author’s books and lots going on. Hope to see you there!

BlogCatalog

Christian Blogs - BlogCatalog Blog Directory

Published in:  on October 26, 2009 at 7:29 am Leave a Comment

The Bounding Main with icing

I felt like a five year old in her big sister’s clothes. The leggings were too long. They came up to my collarbone, and dragged on the ground. The coat, a combination of raingear and personal flotation device (lifejacket for those of us who don’t like techhie terms) hung way past my fingertips and felt lined with lead. But it was bright red, which I liked, and before the afternoon was over, I was really glad I had them. We climbed aboard the boat, and it cruised out of the harbour. I tried to pinpoint the landmarks I knew so well from the landward side of the city. As we cleared the last of the harbour and moved out into the open water, my attention was taken by the sky. It was a cloudy day promising rain, and the cover was layered and multifaceted. To the west, heavy black clouds blotted out most of coastal Washington, and dimmed the light of the day. To the north east the sky lightened and brilliant sun shone in a clear blue sky, its light winking and shattering on the sea. Between them, almost over us, in a thick grey spear, a lower cloud layer pointed straight at the Port Angeles coastline, slanting down to sea level at its apex, just on the coast.

We skimmed over the water for an endless time – a time of simply being – seeing the sky and the dull grey water, the land misty and distant, smelling salt and engine oil, hearing the roar of the engine and the occasional voices of the others on the boat, feeling the wind on my face – not a gentle breeze, not at 30 kph or so, this was a hard stream of air buffeting my cheeks and forehead. The salt spray tasted like cold tears when I licked my lips. It was as if I were back in my childhood, sitting in the boat on the way to the cottage. I had forgotten the peace of those trips, how serene it was to be on the water, away from everything but the senses.

We noticed a flotilla of zodiacs in the distance to the west of us, travelling at speed, and our captain, Chris, slowed down to let them pass in front of us, then swung round so our course followed theirs. Al and I speculated about what they were – they were far enough that we couldn’t see any markings, just stick figures in them – black and white and grey at that distance. Then we noticed the helicopters circling an anchored, unmarked ship – the zodiacs were headed for them. We’d stumbled upon some kind of military boarding exercise, and watched in fascination as the zodiacs circled and the helis dropped down close to the deck of the ship. The heli’s underside dropped strands with swarming, sliding figures and within seconds, the men were down and moving around on the ship, the heli lifting away and the second chopper moved in to drop its load.

We kept moving until they were dots in the far distance and according to the map, we were just a little past Oak Bay – our naturalist pointed out San Juan Island ahead of us. We slowed down, then stopped and the engines cut out. We drifted, waiting, and I counted four other whale watching boats in the area. I could see nothing – no dorsal fins cut the surface, no massive breaching or sprays. But I didn’t care. Just being out here and enjoying the day was enough – whales would be icing on the cake. Then the woman next to me nudged her partner and said she’d seen an Orca swim under the boat. The naturalist confirmed it, and sure enough, a few yards out, a dorsal fin and part of a black and white back broke the surface. After that, we saw a number of them – two or three popped out to take a look around and a few breached – leaped out of the water and smashed back down, sending spray everywhere.

As the weather caught up with us, we turned and headed back the way we came. The wind came first, adding to that caused by our speed, and colder than it had been since we left the harbour. The sea roughened up and we bounced hard over the swells, up and down, to and fro, our bodies swaying and lifting as the boat traveled over the water. I was glad when the naturalist handed out the wool caps. Even with that, and the heavy rain gear, with my own layers underneath, the cold seeped through and my fingers were red and stiff. The rain felt like hail on my face as we traveled west and south, past the entrance to the harbour, and kept on toward, on land, Metchosin and Sooke. After another endless colder time we slowed again. Looking for humpbacks this time. I was sure I wouldn’t catch sight of them when they broke the surface, they are a dull brown, almost the same colour as the water, and their dorsal fins are small and close to their backs. And it seemed so, since all the others were catching glimpses and seeing the fins, but I still didn’t care – I’d seen the Orcas, how much more joy could you fit into one afternoon? Yet, I did see two or three, and caught the tail of one as it dove deep – the flutes flipping up and then slipping into the water as it dove deep.

There was one more gift – one the crew didn’t expect. On the last leg toward Race Rocks, we could hear seagulls screaming in the distance, and a boil of them on the surface of the water. It was a herring run, and thousands of seabirds had gathered to feast on them. So Chris slowly and carefully piloted the boat into the mass of birds – birds overhead, on the water, lifting off and settling down. Never staying still for a moment – it was a literal boil of birds. At the epicentre, in a tiny circle no more than three or four birds across, we could see the silver fish flipping and darting below the surface – all this for two feet of fish? I wondered how deep the school went, or if these were the final survivors after hours of feeding frenzy. Still, we pulled away and within minutes we were literally covered by gulls. They flew only three or four feet above our heads, and were so thick we couldn’t see the sky for them.

Race Rocks was another joy – California sea lions and Arctic? Sea Lions on their migrations – this is one of two areas in the world where the migration routes overlap. They lolled on the islands, huge fur covered mound of blubber looking awkward and clumsy and regal. But swimming, they were dancers, darting, gliding twisting or just cutting through the fast currents as if they owned the sea.

After that it was back to the harbour, and a cup of hot chocolate waiting for us. Tired, wind burned and full of serene joy at the glory of the day.

Published in:  on October 1, 2009 at 3:50 am Comments (2)
Tags: , , , , , , , , ,

I love this!

I found Narnia & some pizza crusts

thank you to Matushka Donna for showing me this!

Published in:  on September 22, 2009 at 6:09 am Leave a Comment
Tags: , , ,

Really good poem

Please check out the poem, “Heart” my godson, the very talented poet and songwriter, Matthew David Christopherson, left on the Faith page after my guest blogger’s post. It’s not his poem, but it’s very much the same thoughts as Theodora expressed. Lovely work.

Published in:  on at 6:05 am Leave a Comment
Tags: , ,

Magic like you won’t believe.

I love magic and magic tricks, and every year we go to the Murray Hatfield charity show at a local theatre. We’ve seen the guy below – Shawn Farquhar – a couple of times, and he’s amazing, but this just blows me away – not only the magic he does, but the dexterity and discpline it takes to become that good with your hands.

Published in:  on September 5, 2009 at 12:28 am Leave a Comment

New Post on Faith Page

I have a guest blogger on my faith page – she’s not actually a blogger, but posts meditations by email every so often, and with my wonderful “hippy hermit’s” permission, I’ve posted one of them. It’s a meditation about end of life, loving your neighbour, not judging. Please check it out, and do leave a comment.

Published in:  on September 4, 2009 at 3:38 am Leave a Comment